The Year Of...
Every year it's something, and we've been naming what it is. We do this in December or January, and then watch as the year lives up to our prediction, in part due to confirmation bias, but mostly because we are extremely smart and influential.
What follows is a review of the years past, culminating in the announcement of what 2013 holds.
2009 – The Year of the Tranny
We got this one 2 years ahead of the New York Times, who waited until December 2010 to name that the year of the transexual. We weren't as politically correct in early 2009. It was a year of a lot of make-up and wigs that left everyone extremely well-prepared for the advent of ChatRoulette in November of that year. Needles Jones played shows in New York back then, but hasn't been around as much since.
2010 – The Year of Decadence
This year got off to a fast start with everyone doing drugs on Chatroulette and swilling Joose and Four Loko, both of which were still legal. No one had jobs then, so there was nothing to do but stay awake until 6 am.
2011 – The Year of Lemons
Limes were through. They were the crutch of those who want to seem festive. Lemons were back in style and appeared in drinks everywhere. They had the clean fresh taste you forgot about, or at least forgot you could eat if you're used to it in furniture polish. The worst part of this year is that lemons have a lot more seeds than limes.
2012 – The Year of the Break-Up
Last year was dubbed the Year of the Break-Up probably out of spite, but did it ever prove prophetic. If you and your lover made it through last year, one of you will probably end up making the other a widow or widower, because you're built to last. In 2012 the economy picked up and people gave up on settling at home. Search costs were down. Optimism was up. In our sister magazine we name names of break ups, but Spectacle would never do that. We deal in trends, not gossip.
In any case, that leads us to this year.
2013 – The Year of the Make-Up
2013 will be the Year of the Make-Up. Why? Because it rhymes with 2012, which makes it more correct than "Year of the Hunk," which was the runner-up. Anything that rhymes is truer. Remember "If it doesn't fit, you must acquit." Also, if people start wearing a lot of cosmetics, we can still say we were right.
However, there is some evidence that there is a thaw in the air. In late December, an eight-year feud between this magazine's editor, Mike Cherpeko, and John Rhee came to an end. "I realize I hate other people more," explained Mr. Rhee.
You can't argue with that logic.blog comments powered by Disqus